21

21.

believe it or not, I am turning that milestone age, twenty-freakin-one.

have ...21 years gone by that quickly?

and if tomorrow were my last day, what could i say that i have accomplished?

back here again.

oh, so much easier said than done.

I can't get out of my own insecurities.
I can't let go of my pride.
I can't stop wishing things would all be better.
I can't stop criticizing myself.
I can't.

first bite

I should be studying for my Japanese final tomorrow...
but knowing I can only get an A- in the class isn't motivating me to do any work...
I guess that explains all the facebook, limewire, and this current blog.

Well, last friday....I went to my first FICB banquet thingie.
It was great. Cool performances. Cool food. Cool people. All for God.


So I thought this picture was cool because it obviously has all the sophomore girls...
But look closely, we're all aligned like a cross.
Double cool. heehee.

Other than that...It was also Vicky's 20th birthday this past weekend.
Gregoire's sandwiches, Nation's Banana Cream Pie x2, and more.
Happy Birthday, Vicky Ma.

Hm. More news.
I officially started my diet this week.
Thanks to myplate.com, I am successfully counting all the calories I consume.
Plus frequent RSF outings.


Motivation to us all. Sigh.

Can't wait till summer break! YAY!

second plate

I actually crossed!

Enough pledging. Enough whining. Enough MIA-ing.


Me and the bros<3

first plate

I want to go back in time.
Back to the dreams of becoming a doctor, ballerina, singer, or announcer...
Back to waking up to Sailor Moon, trips to the Zoo, snack time and sleep time during school, and recess on the playground...


Now, I just seem to helplessly count down the days before law school, endless hours at work, and migraines.

I now understand why parents vicariously live through their children.


Ew. Enough pessimism.

YUM.

fourth cup

(Mahnee Bogoshipuh-I miss you a lot.)

Friend.
Dictionary: a person attached to another by feelings of affection or personal regard; a person who is on good terms with another; a person who is not hostile; a person who gives assistance; patron; supporter
Synonyms: Homie. Buddy. Crime buddy.

I miss the old. Love the new.

Roomies.

Two of the lovers.

Small Group

New Friends.


God Bless.

third cup

Time and time again, I am reminded of how much I love my parents.
My Dad never makes his feelings known...he much likes to keep all his emotions and feelings to himself.
That is why he never makes an effort to physically show me how he feels.
My Mom always makes her feelings known...whether it is expressed through emails, over the phone, or with a simple hug and kiss..she always takes the time to make her thoughts known.
Whether they show it or not, I feel so blessed to be loved unconditionally.

I take on from my Mom and definitely make my feelings known. (hmm, not so sure if that's good or bad)
That is why I am sure it is apparent that I am obviously stressed by family issues at home.
I miss how we used to be...the Cheong family.
I miss almost gagging from their PDA...or them ecstatically planning our next family trip.
Is my absence at home to blame?

Aw man. Why are my posts so emo?

second cup

It's 2:30 in the morning and I still have yet to pack.
I officially ordain myself the Queen of Procrastination.
My essays, studying, and packing are all a testament to my decree.

Anyways, I am going home today (technically).
However, I don't feel that surge of excitement I usually get hours before my flight.
I feel burdened, worried, and stressed with what I am going to have to bear through the weekend...
I fear the thought of living at home with the two people I love the most in this world whose relationship is on the rocks right now....
Does that even make sense?
Well, God will pull through.

Hmm. I wish I had more time to update this blog.
I wish I went out to party tonight.

first cup

Wearing pink jammie pants.
Listening to F.O.B. music.
Pretending to study some Art History.

I woke up today with the narliest headache.
Popped some pills and went back to sleep.
Oh, what a productive Saturday.
I have two formidable midterms this coming Monday and Tuesday.
And what am I doing?
Not studying!
Oh, I have to go to the gym today.
That pushes me back another couple hours.
Great.

Can't wait wait till I go home this Friday.
Can't wait wait till I go home the following weekend for spring break.
Oh, how spoiled am I.

What is this verbal vomit?
Blah.
Blah.
Blah.